Award-winning Palestinian author on Israeli prison, exile and homeland

The nighttime Basim Khandakji’s caller won the 2024 “Arabic Booker Prize”, Israeli situation guards stormed his cell, assaulted him, bound his hands and feet, and threatened him.

The 42-year-old was past placed successful Ofer Prison’s solitary confinement for 12 days.

It was retaliation, helium believes, for embarrassing the Israeli situation system, managing to people a publication nether the noses of guards, drafting attraction to himself and the conditions helium faced.

Now helium is retired of Israeli situation aft serving 21 years of 3 beingness sentences.

“I inactive consciousness similar I’m dreaming, and I’m terrified I mightiness aftermath up and find myself backmost successful a cell,” Khandakji said.

After his release, helium remains incapable to instrumentality location to his household successful Nablus. Exiled from his homeland by Israel, helium present waits successful Egypt arsenic his household fights to scope him.

‘We saw caller horrors’

As blessed arsenic helium is astir escaping “the cemetery of the living” successful Israeli prisons, Khandakji is inactive trying to process the horrors that helium saw determination and his sadness astatine leaving different prisoners behind.

He was convicted successful 2004 of being portion of a “military cell” and being progressive successful a termination bombing successful Tel Aviv, a transgression helium says helium was forced to confess to.

“The lawyer told maine I had to motion a confession … truthful that 3 young men could beryllium spared beingness sentences. There was a benignant of quid pro quo: You admit to a peculiar complaint successful speech for getting immoderate younger men retired of beingness sentences, and that is what happened.”

The United Nations estimates that astatine slightest 75 Palestinians person died successful Israeli prisons since October 2023, and organisations similar B’Tselem and the Palestinian Centre for Human Rights person revealed systematic abuse.

Khandakji spent months astatine a clip successful solitary confinement and was often moved betwixt prisons, spending clip successful astir of Israel’s 19 facilities that clasp Palestinians – each arsenic “hellish” arsenic the last, helium tells Al Jazeera.

“There are deliberate policies of starvation, abuse, intelligence and carnal torture, changeless humiliation, and intentional aesculapian neglect.”

Images of released Palestinian detainees person prompted outrage astir the world. Appearing acceptable and steadfast successful photos of them earlier incarceration, connected release, galore had been reduced to emaciated, cadaverous shadows of their erstwhile selves.

Things changed, Khandakji says, aft October 7, 2023 – the day of a Hamas-led onslaught during which 1,139 radical died successful Israel and immoderate 250 were taken captive, successful effect to which Israel launched a two-year genocidal warfare connected Gaza.

Khandakji says prisoners began to dice with shocking regularity, with guards utilizing “new horrific methods” – peculiarly connected detainees rounded up by the hundreds from Gaza.

“Inmates saw guards hanging up the bodies of dormant prisoners successful cells and leaving them there, decaying,” helium said.

“Another told maine helium saw much than 12 dormant bodies packed into cells astatine al-Jalama detention centre.”

Khandakji says the harrowing memories of dormant Palestinians and the brutal torture helium witnessed and experienced volition haunt him for his full life.

“The main strategy authorities utilized to interruption prisoners was starvation,” helium said. “There was besides ‘cooling’, meaning denial of clothing, blankets, oregon immoderate heating during the bitter winter.

“There was besides changeless beatings,” helium added. “They usage horrifying, savage methods – targeting the head, neck, and spine.”

Al Jazeera reached retired to Israeli situation authorities for remark connected Khandakji’s accusations, but received nary reply.

Basem Khandakji hadn’t seen the books helium published portion helium was successful situation [Courtesy of the Khandakji family]

Communication with friends and household was banned, helium added, and helium was prevented from accessing quality from the extracurricular satellite – though helium did person connection of his father’s death.

“I was deprived of my begetter portion helium was alive, and aft his decease I was denied the accidental to hide him,” helium said.

Nearly 9,000 Palestinians stay successful Israeli jails, galore taken successful wide roundups, and much than 3,500 are held nether “administrative detention”, which Israel created to warrant imprisoning radical indefinitely without complaint oregon trial.

Smuggling retired an award-winning novel

In prison, Khandakji says: “Writing gave maine … a refuge, a hiding spot done which I could flight the brutality of the jailhouse and reclaim my freedom, adjacent if lone successful my imagination.”

He had to spell connected hunger onslaught repeatedly to get notebooks and pens.

He wrote arsenic overmuch arsenic helium could, keeping his manuscripts hidden from the guards and staying retired of their mode until helium could smuggle his penning retired via his lawyer oregon immoderate different visitor.

In 2023, his award-winning novel, A Mask, The Colour of the Sky, was published successful Lebanon successful Arabic and was shortlisted for the International Prize for Arabic Fiction, known arsenic the Arabic Booker.

The publication tells the communicative of Nur, a Palestinian archaeologist who finds an Israeli ID and takes connected the individuality of “Ur”, yet joining an archaeological excavation connected an amerciable Israeli settlement.

In it, Khandakji reflects connected the uncovering of Palestine’s antiquity and the quality betwixt the constrained beingness of Nur with his Palestinian ID and Ur, whose sky-blue ID allowed him to spell anywhere.

Hearing of the shortlisting, an enraged ultranationalist Israeli nationalist information minister, Itamar Ben-Gvir, demanded harsher conditions for Khandakji, portion others connected the Israeli utmost close called for his murder.

His grant triumph included a $50,000 prize and backing for an English translation, paving the mode for a planetary readership.

When Israel launched its warfare connected Gaza, conditions became worse successful the prison, and guards confiscated Khandakji’s penning worldly and smashed his speechmaking glasses.

He felt “completely powerless”, helium says. “Being deprived of my pens and notebooks felt similar being deprived of air.”

Now free, helium aims to people different novel, which helium wrote successful his caput successful his last twelvemonth of captivity. It is based connected 1 of his closest friends, writer Walid Daqqa, who died of crab aft allegedly deliberate aesculapian neglect by situation authorities.

Aside from writing, Khandakji’s lone solace successful jailhouse was the friendships helium made “that adjacent decease cannot erase”.

“I unrecorded with sorrow and symptom due to the fact that I near down truthful galore friends successful prison, inactive suffering,” helium adds.

One of these friends, with whom helium shared a cell, was Fatah person Marwan Barghouthi, sentenced to 5 beingness sentences positive 40 years successful 2004.

Barghouthi is often compared to South African anti-apartheid person Nelson Mandela, owed to his decades down bars arsenic a governmental captive and the unifying popularity helium has among Palestinians.

“Marwan Barghouthi is simply a large man,” helium said. “If helium were released, helium could go a unifying nationalist figure.”

The 66-year-old was beaten unconscious past period by Israeli jailhouse authorities, and his son, Arab, told planetary media his begetter fears for his beingness arsenic Israel continues to disregard planetary calls for his release.

His homeland lives wrong him

Khandakji was arrested successful 2004, astatine the property of 21, portion successful his last twelvemonth of a journalism and governmental subject grade astatine An-Najah National University successful his hometown of Nablus.

Raised successful a household of socialists, Khandakji became progressive successful the Palestinian People’s Party arsenic a teenager. He is present an elected subordinate of the party’s governmental bureau.

But during the 2nd Intifada successful the aboriginal 2000s, helium decided to articulation the equipped absorption successful the Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine (PFLP).

Looking back, helium says: “In the end, unit successful each its forms is inhuman.

“As quality beings, we should archetypal effort to lick our issues done peaceful and civilised means,” Khandakji said. “But erstwhile idiosyncratic tries to erase you – to annihilate you – your conflict becomes 1 of existence.

“But if clip could spell back… I mightiness look for different ways,” helium adds, of seeking a antithetic path, 1 that didn’t deprive him of his household for 21 years.

He was 1 of 250 high-profile detainees freed by Israel connected October 13 arsenic portion of the United States-brokered Gaza ceasefire woody betwixt Hamas and Israel.

Israeli captives held by Hamas were released successful speech for astir 2,000 Palestinian detainees, astir of whom were “disappeared” by Israel from Gaza, according to the UN.

Khandakji described the nighttime of his merchandise arsenic “terrifying”, adding that his assemblage was shaking arsenic helium “knew the infinitesimal of state had yet come”.

When helium passed the situation gates and his autobus went southbound alternatively of towards Nablus, helium knew his afloat state would beryllium denied a small longer.

“Being exiled from your homeland is simply a burning, achy feeling,” helium said. “My archetypal joy, archetypal sorrow, and archetypal dreams were each successful my city, Nablus.

“Palestinians, dissimilar others, bash not unrecorded successful their homeland – their homeland lives wrong them,” helium said.

For now, Khandakji volition proceed penning and plans to prosecute a PhD aft achieving a master’s grade successful Israeli studies portion imprisoned.

His household is warring desperately to reunite with him successful Egypt, lone to beryllium repeatedly thwarted by Israel.

“I inactive anticipation that successful the coming period, determination volition beryllium immoderate quality justness that allows maine to clasp my mother,” helium says.

“Not arsenic a freed captive – but simply arsenic a kid searching for the scent of his puerility successful his mother’s arms.”